I am a mother of 2 beautiful children - Jessica who is 37 months old and Alistair who is 6 months old. I have always thought that I am very blessed to have 2 healthy (be it mentally or physically) children, until one day, my world was hit with a hard truth that I will never forget.
At 18 months old, Jess was sent to playgroup. To me, playgroup is a place for her to learn interaction with her peers more than knowledge itself. In the first month, Jess would cry incessantly in class. Teacher Susan would tell me that it's perfectly normal for kids to behave in this way as they are unfamiliar with a new environment.
Over the months and years, Jess' behaviour made me suspect that she may be autistic. Her love for building blocks and lining them up neatly (very much like OCD) made the suspicion even stronger. But, it was her love for playing alone in a corner and refusal to acknowledge people and refusal to speak to her teacher and peers that sent even stronger signals to me. In fact, I often questioned if Jess was really autistic or was she just overly shy.
In the recent months, I was finally hit with the reality that Jess MAY be autistic.
At 35 months old, I brought Jess to visit a dentist at Health Promotion Board. For 10 minutes, the dentist couldn't get her to follow simple instructions and she would cry non-stop. Thinking that she could be just unfamiliar with seeing a dentist, I heeded my friends' advice to bring Jess to the pediatric dentist at National Dental Centre. Dr Terry Teo tried to examine her but in vain. I was asked to leave the room so that Jess could calm down and listen to his instructions. But Jess wouldn't stop crying. After the session, Dr Teo told me that Jess "has an interesting behaviour and rather different" from the kids whom he has met. He did not tell me his suspicions then but the hint was quite a strong signal for me.
Nearly at the same time, I engaged a swimming instructor, Justin, whom I am eternally grateful to. On Jess' first swimming lesson, Jess wouldn't stop crying and refused to listen to Justin's instructions. Justin told me that we would let her try a few more sessions but if she continues with her behaviour, he would have to drop her. On the second lesson, things did not improve. She cried for a good half an hour without stopping and refused to take in any instructions. At the end of the lesson (which did not even start in the first place), Justin told me straight that judging from Jess' behaviour, it is very much like the autistic children that he has dealt with. He suggested that I get a diagnosis done on her and to keep him updated.
Moving forward, we got a polyclinic referral to KKH's Child Development Unit where Dr Padmini did a diagnosis on her and confirmed that she has Autism Spectrum Disorder and Selective Mutism.
Selective mutism...what is that?
I did a google search and realised that this condition is so rare, information is very scarce. However, I was enlightened when I stumbled upon this website: www.selectivemutismcenter.org.
In a nutshell, selective mutism is when a child behaves like any normal kid in a familiar environment but displays extreme fear and unsettleness to unfamiliar environment and people. This is actually an anxiety and fear issue that falls outside of autism. If left untreated, it will lead to social problems and delay in the child's development. According to Dr Padmini, intensive treatment is needed so that she will recover faster.
Now I can only hope and pray that I have the strength to go on when Jess' therapy starts.
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